ROMNEY COMPLETES MISSION OF CLAIMING ALL POSITIONS ON ALL ISSUES TO THWART ANY ATTACK FROM OBAMA

by R J Shulman

GEMENI, Georgia – (PTSD News Service) – By stating that he has no anti-abortion legislative agenda on Tuesday and then on Wednesday saying his is a pro-lifer to the core, presidential hopeful Mitt Romney has completed the daunting task of having publically supported opposing positions on every significant political issues of this election season. “Now I am in the catbird’s seat,” said a jubilant Romney, “whether it be a discussion or a national debate, whatever Obama says I stand for, I will have demonstrable proof that I have taken the opposite position. And once I can show that he is wrong about that, I can convince the voters that he is wrong for America.”

Some of the more notable issues in which Romney has taken opposing sides is saying he was against the automobile industry bailout and then saying he was for it, saying he was for certain provisions of Romneycare and then coming out against the same provision when they were part of Obamacare, and saying he wanted to cut taxes on the wealthy “job creators” and then telling everyone he was not in favor of lowering their taxes. According to an extensive study by Politicon, a non-partisan political watch dog group, of the top five-hundred possible issues this political season, Romney has taken at least two or more positions on every single one of them.

Vice President Joe Biden has criticized Romney’s ever changing positions, saying that, “Romney has more flip-flops than a Chinese footwear factory.” However, Romney immediately countered by saying, “I used to be against flip-flopping, but now I am for it.”