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Post-Times-Sun-Dispatch

The Post-Times-Sun-Dispatch or PTSD is a newsource of serious political satire. Don't let a day go by without PTSD.

Wednesday, May 05, 2010

TEA PARTY:WE KNEW TIMES SQ. BOMBER WAS NOT ONE OF US
by R J Shulman

DALLAS - (PTSD News) - Tea Party members as well as other prominant conservatives say they were not concerned the failed New York bomber was going to be one of their own. "Once we learned the facts of the case," said Harlan Ashworth, a Dallas Tea Party leader, "we knew it couldn't be one of our boys."

"We hate the government and especially New York liberals," Ashworth said, "but here is why it wasn't no good old boy who done it. First, we'd use an American truck like a Dodge, Ford or Chevy, not some wimply Nissan. Second, no self-respecting country boy would be stupid enough to use that wrong, non-exploding fertilizer. Third, what Second Amendment loving Conservative would have left perfectly good gun lockers to be blown up in a vehicle, and finally, we would use a vehicle with licnese plate from a real American state like Oklahoma, Tennessee, or Texas. With those Connecticut plates that joker used, somebody might think Martha Steward was trying to blow up a mismatched place setting."

Authorities are holding Faisil Shahzad, an American citizen of Pakistani origin who has admitted to leaving the explosive laden vehicle near Times Square.


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