BUSH SURPRISED THAT TORNADOES CAUSED DAMAGE
By R J Shulman
JACKSON, Tennessee – President Bush took a tour of the devastation caused by tornadoes that left more than 50 people dead in several mid-south states. “No one could have known that tornadoes would have tornadoed through tornado alley,” Bush said.

“The good news,” Bush continued, “is that we have Brownie to do a heck of a job for these folks in Arkansee and Tennessaw.” When told by a staffer that Michael Brown resigned almost two years ago, Bush said, “No one could have known that Brownie would resign. But don’t worry as we can bring them formaldehyde trailers up from Louisiana for the folks here whose houses were made flat as a pancake.

“The people who lost their lives in the tornados,” said Barbara Bush, “were under privileged anyway, so their deaths have worked out pretty well for them.” “If people don’t vote for a Republican in the election,” said Vice President Dick Cheney, “we will be hit again by tornadoes and we will be hit hard.”