BUSH ALMOST HUMBLED THINKING PRESIDENT’S DAY IS JUST FOR HIM
By R J Shulman
TANZANIA – President Bush told reporters today that he wished he could be back in the United States. “After all,” Bush said, “as the only President, President’s Day is a day just for me. If I was a humble man, I’d be humbilicated by that. When I get back from spreading demagoguery throughout Africa, as demagoguery is on the march, I will decide as the decider which dominion of money I will put my face on, probably the ten thousand dollar bill, heh, heh.”

The President said he didn’t know why theyhave his special day in February and not on his birthday. He promised that he would issue an executive order changing President’s day to his birthday as soon as he asked Laura just what day that is.