SEARCH CONTINUES FOR DICK CHENEYS’ MISSING FEMININE SIDE
By R J Shulman
CASPER, Wyoming - The search continues for the missing feminine side of Vice President Dick Cheney. “We are losing hope of ever finding it,” said Ralph P. White of the Wyoming State Police. “We have been looking for days, years actually.”

“We have heard the cry for help,” said Willard Pinkus, an aide to the Vice President, “you know him forcing his friend Harry to apologize for getting his face in the way of Dick’s bullet, for Dick’s invading helpless countries, enjoying torture and for constantly posing with firearms in photo ops.”

“I don’t think there is a chance in hell we will find it,” said Marcy Collins a volunteer searcher, “although I suspect hell is where his feminine side is waiting for him.”