OBAMA TO TAKE UNFAIR ADVANTAGE OF MEDICALLY AILING CONGRESS

by R J Shulman

WASHINGTON – (PTSD News Service) – The most revealing lesson emerging from the Syrian crisis is not whether some red line that got crossed belonged to the world or just to Barack Obama, or which of the Syrian rebel groups who will get weapons from the US will be the first to use them against US troops or if from twenty yards Obama could hit Vladimir Putin with a fig newton.  No, that stuff is just small potatoes next to the giant spud that is how Obama has kicked Congress when it is down, that is, how he has stooped so low as to take unfair advantage of members of Congress who he knew were suffering from a severe medical condition, called the Oboposite Syndrome.

Oboposite Syndrome, first discovered and named by internationally renowned psychiatrist Dr. Princeton Ivey of Cornell University described the disease as, “whenever Barack Obama discusses a certain topic in an affirmative manner, those affected with Oboposite Syndrome or OS, who are mostly Republicans, immediately respond without thinking to that aforementioned subject in a negative manner, while in reverse, if Obama takes a position of negation toward a topic, these stricken Republicans exhibit an immediate response of acceptance toward that idea, position or philosophy.”  Or as Harley Stubbs, of Buzzard Holler, West Virginia put it, OS is “Wha’tever Obama is fer, GOPers is agin’ and wha’tever Obama is agin’, theys fer.”

The Post Times Sun Dispatch has learned from reliable sources that President Obama, knowing that almost all of the Republicans in Congress along with some Democrats were completely infected with OS, deliberately asked Congress to support a military strike on Syria, when his plan all along was not the “shoot first, diplomatize later,” doctrine of former President George W. Bush, but was to find a non-military solution.   

“When someone says war to a Republican,” said political analyst James Carville, “they shout ‘more, more, more,’ like they were Billy Idol doing a reprise of his hit, Rebel Yell. But then Obama says he is in favor of dropping bombs and striking the enemy and these Republicans suffering from severe OS say they do not want to go to war.  This is the first time Republicans don’t want a war since, well, since war was invented.”  “What Obama did to take unfair advantage of a sick Congress is nothing less than using shock and awe below the belt,” said Newt Gingrich.

The Post Times Sun Dispatch has discovered from highly reliable and exclusive source that President Obama has been emboldened by his successful unconscionable conduct toward Congress and plans to attack them again.  He plans to take advantage of their weakened Oboposite Syndrome ridden minds to further his agenda and quest for absolute power.

First, Obama is going to propose crippling cuts to education that specifically targets poor and minority students, knowing the OS riddled Republicans in Congress will vote against these cuts and moreover that the most severely sickened OS sufferers, who are the Tea Partiers, will not only block cuts to educational aid to the poor and minorities, but will insist that these underprivileged children be provided with special tutors and free admission to the best Ivy League prep schools.

Next, Obama will ask the OS sickened House to overturn his biggest mistake: Obamacare, knowing that severely ill House Republicans will not only not take their 42^nd vote to repeal the Affordable Health Care Act, but, instead, will propose a single payor government run health care system.

Finally, President Obama will demand that the House of Representative vote to impeach him.  Obama knows that House Republicans are so sick with OS, that they will not only block any vote to impeach him, but will pass a bill to make Obama President for Life.

“Unlike George W. Bush who liked to depose dictators and end evil rulers’ cruel tyranny by blowing up their country and smoking them out, dead or alive,” said Luke John, a history professor art Liberty University, “Obama will take advantage of a sick congress and get them to support his real plan, the one where he will create a new dictator – himself.”