CALIFORNIA GOP PLANS TO TURN ELECTORAL COLLEGE INTO AN ANIMAL HOUSE
By R J Shulman
SACRAMENTO, California - As the signature deadline nears, a group trying to put an initiative on the California ballot to change the winner take all nature of the Presidential electoral college votes appears to have enough signatures. “We are going to tell the voters that this is a good way to have their vote counted without the egg head electoral college stealing their votes on a technicality, said Dave Guiliard of the initiative, “but the real reason we are doing this in California, a state that goes Democratic, is to basically get about 20 electoral votes for the Republicans that we would not normally get. Of course for this collegiate prank to work, we have to make sure that in Republican states like Texas and Georgia, Republican majority states, that the winner-take- all will be kept in place.”

“With this new strategy,” said Karl Rove, “who needs to steal a Florida or Ohio again?” “Even though this strategy is surly unconstitutional,” said an unnamed GOP spokes person, “we have the votes on the Supreme court to fix that little technicality, too.” “Why,” continued the spokesperson, “ should Russia be winning the race to have the most sophisticated fixed elections? America needs to be able to continue to hold its head up as being number one.”