NEW REPORT: AL GORE ADDS TO GLOBAL WARMING BY BREATHING
by R J Shulman
HOUSTON, TX – In a new report issued by Findings in Energy and National Defense, or FIEND, a think tank sponsored by Exxon/Mobil, Al Gore has been determined to be the biggest hypocrite regarding global warming. “If it turns out that there is global warming, a question which is seriously still in doubt” the report said, “Al Gore adds to it every time he breaths out carbon dioxide.”

“In fact,” says Oscar Carbondale, the scientist hired by FIEND for the study, “Al Gore adds to the warming problems every time he eats as his body coverts food into heat.” The report, which is slated to go on the road to 15 cities as a slide show, was issued today in Houston, and concluded that global warming could continue to be a possible problem until Al Gore stops breathing and eating.”