HATED PHARMACEUTICAL CEO’S BAIL HIKED FROM $5 MILLION TO $500 BILLION

by R J Shulman

NEW YORK – (PTSD News Service) – In a surprise move, US Magistrate Judge Robert Levy radically increased bail for Martin Shkreli who is facing criminal charges that he bilked his former company out of millions.  Shkreli, who made headlines earlier this year for raising an AIDS drug 5000%, complained about the bail increase to Levy who said, “turnaround is fair play.”

The prosecution, who was originally seeking charges that could land Shkreli in jail for 20 years, refiled for charges that if convicted could send the former Turing Pharmaceutical CEO to jail for 100,000 years.

Lawyers for Shkreli refused to comment, except for one tweet which said, “Shkreli is Shkrewed.”

In a related story, n new Quinnipiac University poll shows Shkreli running third in the Republican presidential race at 11%, behind Donald Trump and Ted Cruz even though the embattled CEO has not officially entered the GOP contest. “This is an odd occurrence in an odd campaign,” said Casey Lemon, a senior Washington political analyst, “but considering how mean all the other Republican candidates are, Shkreli’s numbers seem just about right.