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The Post-Times-Sun-Dispatch or PTSD is a newsource of serious political satire. Don't let a day go by without PTSD.

Saturday, December 24, 2011

by R J Shulman

BETHLEHEM, Pennsylvania – (PTSD News Service) – An epidemic sweeping faster than the super flu has spread across the United States and other parts of the world, bringing in sudden peace and pleasant thoughts about others.  “We really can’t explain it,” said William G. Feeney of the Calvary Institute of Bethlehem, Pennsylvania, “but it is like the whole world has gone mad by acting different than they normally do for no reason we can ascertain.”  Incidents of unexpected niceness have been reported from San Diego, California to Penobscot, Maine and from Olympia, Washington to Key West, Florida.

“The most frightening thing out this pestilence is the thought that there will be endless peace,” said David Lesar CEO of Halliburton, “and that just can’t be good for business.”  “I don’t know what will happen if this breakout of peace ends the War on Christmas, said Fox’s Bill O’Reilly, “I’ll have nothing to talk about and I may just lose my will to live.”

The sudden plague of peace caught some politicians off guard. “I was so shocked that I actually enjoyed that we came to a bipartisanship agreement on extending unemployment benefits, that I forgot to have a drink today,” said House Majority Leader John Boehner.  Other people began to question their sanity.  “I was thinking about Obama and suddenly was overcome with a warm feeling, “said Cooter McGoon, a Tea Party member from Greer, South Carolina, “so I checked myself into the loony bin.”

“If this feeling of good will lasts for more than a day or two,” said Rush Limbaugh, “no amount of mama’s special little pills will be able to ease my pain.”

So far the good feelings and peace seems to be holding, but that is of course, subject to change.

Peace and Good Tidings to you from the Post Times Sun Dispatch


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