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The Post-Times-Sun-Dispatch or PTSD is a newsource of serious political satire. Don't let a day go by without PTSD.

Thursday, October 28, 2010

by R J Shulman

WASHINGTON - (PTSD News) - As the election nears, prominent conservatives and Tea Party candidates have gone on the offensive to support their belief that any Constitutional separation between a person's religious beleif and their right to dispise who they want to is nothing more than activist liberal judges interfering with their freedom "I challenge anyone to show me where in the Constitution the founding fathers said anything about there being this separation between church and hate," said Rand Paul who is running for the Senate from Kentucky.

"The founding fathers were all Christians who believed they had a right to hate and infact, just like us modern day Tea Party patriots," Paul said, "they hated taxes, anyone who tried to take their guns, a tyrant in office who thought he was a king like Obama does today, and like any good American, they hated the French."

"I second that devotion," said Sarah Palin who appeared at a rally for Rand in Bowling Green, Kentucky, "the Constituton doesn't prevent good Christian Americans from hating Moose limbs and I refutiate anyone who can show me where Moose limbs, especially terrorist Obama pal Moose limbs get special rights that protects them from the righteous hatred of true Americans who want to refutiate their building of Mosque over our 9-11 gravesites."

"There can be no doubt this country was set up as a Christian nation," said Michele Bachmann (R-Minn). "Do the names Washington and Jefferson sound Jewish of like tent dwelling A-Rabs? No. OK so they sound a little Negro, but they are still Christian names."

"Our bible is brimming with the right of righteous peoople to smite their enemies," said Sharron Angle, who is trying to unseat Harry Reid in the Nevada Senate race, "and no bucket full of Asian looking Hispanics can take away my right to smite Harry Reid."

When asked if he thought a country that supported the attacking of those of a different faith was more like a fundamentalist Islamic state than America, Joe Miller who is running for the Senate in Alaska on the Tea Party ticket said, "the Islamofascists had it right that the government can and must be used to uphold good religious values, but where they got it wrong is that they have the wrong God."

"Jesus Christ didn't get to where he got by acting like a gay French Surrenanista and turning the other cheeck," said House Minority Leader John Boehner, "He beleived in what he believed in and if someone didn't believe in him, he kicked his ass. Now that's being tough like true Americans and if you don't beleive me that Jesus was tough, just try kicking someone's ass while wearing sandals."


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