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The Post-Times-Sun-Dispatch or PTSD is a newsource of serious political satire. Don't let a day go by without PTSD.

Saturday, July 17, 2010

by R J Shulman

WASHINGTON - (PTSD News) - Even though he spoke against "socialized medicine," former Vice President Dick Cheney used his government health insurance for his recent heart surgery after experiecing increasing congestive heart failure. Cheney has been resting from the surgery in which he had a left ventricular assist device installed. The doctors had to use parts of a pig heart to complete the procedure. "The reason we had to find swine heart parts," said Dr. Sidney Gupta of the Fairfax Heart and Vascular Institute, "was becuase in Mr. Cheney's case, no human heart was a match. It was not so much that Cheney rejected the human hearts, but the hearts all seemed to reject him."

Gupta said he expected Cheney to have a full recovery with the slight side affect that the former VP seems to have lost his taste for bacon. "He will be up and running and ready to torture enemies in no time,"Gupta said.

"What really kept Dick going is that he wants to live to see at least 1000 more deep water wells drilled in the Gulf and I don't think he will leave us until then," said his wife Lynn.
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