GINGRICH:PELOSI MUST COME CLEAN THAT SHE KNEW I WAS DIVORCING MY CANCER STRICKEN WIFE
Post-Times-Sun-Dispatch
The Post-Times-Sun-Dispatch or PTSD is a newsource of serious political satire. Don't let a day go by without PTSD.
Monday, May 18, 2009
By R J Shulman
WASHINGTON – (PTSD News) – Republican attacks on Nancy Pelosi have hit a fever pitch, led by Newt Gingrich’s demands that the Speaker of the House make an apology to the American people because she has not been truthful about what she knew. “We now know she was well aware I was going to the hospital to divorce my first wife who was suffering with cancer, yet Pelosi never objected to my action.” This follows an attack from Dick Cheney who said Pelosi had been briefed about “that rat-fink lawyer who got his stupid face in the way of my shotgun, but she chose to keep the American people in the dark. Such secretive behavior by a high ranking government official should be grounds for censure.”
Pelosi’s recent troubles began when she claimed she was misinformed by the CIA regarding enhanced interrogation techniques used on suspected terrorist detainees. CIA chief Leon Panetta shot back, “It is not the policy of the CIA to mislead members of Congress and it is not our policy to follow our policy of not misleading Congress and that couldn’t be any clearer for Pelosi to understand.”
A few Democrats have hinted that the focus of the torture issue should not be Pelosi but high ranking official is the Bush administration who ordered the questionable interrogation techniques. But Republican Senator Kyl of Arizona disagrees. “I’m not in favor of dragging the American people through a so-called ‘truth commission’ who will waste taxpayer dollars looking into the Bush administration’s illegal torture, illegal wire-tapping, illegal politicizing of the Justice Department, illegal outing of CIA personnel and illegal just about everything. I agree with President Obama who says we need to move forward, except for a thorough investigation of what Nancy Pelosi knew and when she knew it.”
“We got Pelosi just where we want her,” said GOP strategist Gip Skullcroft, “she’ll have to resign unless she can produce those secret CIA memos that show she was misled and if she releases those memos, she’ll have to resign for disclosing top secrets.”
Mike Huckabee, former Governor of Arkansas and Republican candidate for president posted a poem about Pelosi on his website: “She sat in a briefing about enhanced interrogation, but did not start her own investigation, so we should take aim at her without delay, before Obama takes our guns away.”
Gingrich concluded by saying, “due to Pelosi’s unacceptable behavior we may have lost the American dream forever and for that, she and the Democrat party should be outlawed immediately.”
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