BALLOT PRINTING ERROR LISTS CANDIDATE AS “BLACK OSAMA”
By R J Shulman
LIMA, Ohio – (PTSD News) – Election officials have discovered yet another error in printed ballots with the election just a week away. Ohio Secretary of State Jennifer Brunner said that the listing of the Democratic candidate as “the Black Osama” seemed more than “an unfortunate accident,” as claimed by a Republican official. This mistake comes on the heels of the error that listed Barack Obama’s running mate as “Joe Biden Laden.”

The ballot problems have not been confined to Ohio. In Florida, in Broward County, the ballot accidentally listed the Democratic vice presidential candidate alternately as William Ayers or Reverend Jeremiah Wright. “We don’t know how it happened,” said Clem Reinhardt, a Florida official in charge of the ballots in question. Further complicating the matter is that ballots in Duval county listed Obama/Biden as the ticket for the Socialist Party.

All of these tainted ballots were traced to Three K Printing Company of Covington, Kentucky. Three K’s CEO Wayne King admitted the error, but said he wasn’t worried. “Being a Christian means that no matter what I do Jesus will forgive me,” King said, “except of course if I vote for Barack Hussein Obama.”

In Colorado, several reports of touch screen irregularities were reported throughout the state. “When I got ready to push the button for Obama," said Florence Marquette, of Colorado Springs, “right next to Barack’s name I saw the words “Anti-Christ” pop up in glowing red.”

“We don’t know how it ended up listing McCain as the Republican and for the Democrat “That One,” said RuthAnne Comstock of the North Carolina election commission, “but it is too late to change it now.”

Franklin Wilson of the Obama campaign has asked for an investigation. “It is curious that all of these errors are in swing states. The American people need to know the truth about what is going on with this election process.” “What the people really want to know,” said John McCain after he was told of the slew of ballot irregularities, “is who is Barack Obama?” Sarah Palin told a crowd of avid supporters in Virginia at the First Bristol Church of the Avenging Christ that “it would be just like those tax and spend liberals to want to waste taxpayer money on correcting ballots.”

“Those corrupt Democrat Communist terrorist supporters are just a bunch of sore loser cry babies, whining over some little glitches in the ballots,” said Sean Hannity of Fox News. “Now ACORN, there is the real story of vote fraud with Mickey Mouse, Iron Man and Count Dracula being registered to vote in thirteen states.”

“The story that is getting lost here,” said John Zogby of the Zogby Poll, “is that even with the ballot in Wisconsin listing the Democrat as Saddam Hussein Hitler Judas Satan Obama, Saddam Hussein Hitler Judas Satan Obama is leading John McCain by 5 points.”