ANGRY BUSH TO MUSHARRAF: WE ARE EXPORTING OUR DEMOCRACY STUFF, NOT MY DECIDER STUFF
By R J Shulman

WASHINGTON, D.C. – In a strongly worded communiqué, President George W. Bush admonished Pakistani leader General Pervez Musharraf for suspending his country’s constitution, arresting members of the Supreme Court, taking control of the media, postponing parliamentary elections and arresting members of the opposition. “You must understan,’” Bush said. “that you countries ending in ‘stan’ such as Afghanistan, Pakistan and Iraqistan are supposed to import the democracy we are exporting, not import the dictator-decider stuff I have been importing to the US.”

“What added insult to injury,” said Presidential Press Secretary Dana Perino, “was that without permission, Musharraf plagiarized President Bush when he used the excuse of future terrorist activities as the reason for his actions.” Perino noted that Bush will send Pakistan what little democracy remains in the US to help Musharraf correct his mistake.

"I think Bush was really angry," said an unnamed White House spokesman, "because Musharraf completed the total export of democracy first."