WALL STREET  AND BANKS TO USE TARP MONEY TO BUY PRESIDENTIAL ELECTION

By R J Shulman

NEW YORK – (PTSD News Service) – Barton Westerfine, a top Citibank executive admitted today that his company, other banks and Wall Street recipients of government bail-out money had formed a super PAC to purchase the presidency for one of their own, Mitt Romney.  “The good news,” Westerfine said, “is that by using the bail-out money, I and my cohorts will not have to miss any of our bonuses.”  The PAC called, One Percenters Rock, has put together a war chest of over $19 billion, which it intends to use to defeat President Obama. 

 

“It really doesn’t matter that Romney has the personality of a stump and has absolutely no new ideas,” said Charleston Van Horn of AIG, another major contributor to One Percenters Rock, “just look what we did to Newt Gingrich in Florida with our 99% plan – that is, pounding the media with 99% negative adds against that fat clown.  By the time we get through with Obama, being a black man in a racist country will be the least of his problems.”

One Percent Rocks will debut its first anti-Obama TV commercial during the Super Bowl depicting the president dressed as Hitler setting fire to an American Flag covering a stack of Bibles, saying in Arabic, “If you give me a second term, this Kenyan born Jihadist is coming for your daughters, wives, guns, beer, and worst of all, your big screen TV.”

 

“Once Romney is in the White House and we have purchased both houses of Congress, we can get rid of all of those pesty little socialist rules and regulations that slow down our plans to buy the world,” Van Horn said.