Post-Times-Sun-Dispatch
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Sunday, January 15, 2012
CORRECTION CORPORATION OF AMERICA TO BUILD STRUCTURES IN
CHINA TO ACCOMMODATE OCCUPY WALL STREET PROTESTORS
By R J Shulman
NASHVILLE, Tennessee – (PTSD News Service) – Corrections Corporation
of America announced a joint venture with the United States Government and
about half of the states to build large facilities in China to provide a home
for members of the Occupy Wall Street Movement that sprung up all over the
country. “We are proud to serve America
by solving the housing problem of all of those citizens who have overrun some
of America’s finest parks and streets outside government buildings,” said John
Ferguson, Chairman of the Board of CCA.
CCA estimated that their new facilities in China will be
able to provide shelter and one square meal a day to over two-hundred and
seventy million Americans, or approximately 99% of the population. “No longer will the homeless, shiftless, lazy,
unwashed hippies who are jealous of the job creators and hard working
billionaires have to block up our streets and public places,” said David Koch,
president of Koch industries, who helped broker the deal. “Even though these
people despise us 1%ers, we still have been kind enough to fund this project
which will give them a roof over their heads and the security of knowing that no
one can break in or out of their new homes.”
The deal, which included the Chinese government, will move
millions of Chinese people to America. “This
will stop the complaints about jobs going to China,” said Koch, “Jobs will now
stay in America because we will soon have men, women and cute little children
willing to work for five dollars a day and who won’t complain about coffee
breaks, getting weekends off or workplace safety.” Koch also pointed out that there are plenty
of houses already here in America for the Chinese who will come over here to
work, because of all the empty houses in foreclosure or left empty by occupy
protestors who “won’t be coming back to their houses any time soon,” Koch said,
“and besides, the Chinese don’t whine like brats when twenty-five or thirty of
them have to live in one room.”
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