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The Post-Times-Sun-Dispatch or PTSD is a newsource of serious political satire. Don't let a day go by without PTSD.

Sunday, January 17, 2010

by R J Shulman

VIRGINIA BEACH, Virginia - (PTSD News) - TV evangelist Pat Robertson has not backed away from his much criticized comment that Haitians' devil worship caused the devastating earthquake. "While the good Lord works in mysterious ways," Robertson said on his 700 Club broadcast today, "there's no mystery why He smote the two world capitals of voodooism, Port-au Prince and New Orleans."

"At first it seemed our glorious merciful God exercised his wrath because of the homosexual activity in the world," Robertson said, "but I got to thinking that He would have made the 1989 San Francisco quake much more horrific than the one in Haiti."

Robertson said the earthquake striking such an underprivileged country destroys the myth that Jesus loved the poor. "Why else would He slam trailer parks with His tornadoes while sparing country clubs?" Robertson asked. "The truth is, God loves the wealthy as He gave them of His bounty. The notion that it is as difficult for a rich man to get into heaven as for a camel to go through the eye of a needle has been sorely misinterpreted. The Eye of the Needle was actually name of a pass near ancient Nazareth that was the easiest place for camels to pass through the mountains."

Robertson ended his broadcast by asking his followers not to be tempted to send donations for Haiti relief efforts as "those people will only use the money to build golden idols to the devil instead of statutes of Christ. If you send your donations to me instead," Roberson told his followers, "I will pray that the good Lord will not strike your trailer park next."

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Anonymous Anonymous said...

The truth is that they did make a pact with the devil.

Now the significance you put on that pact I guess has to do with whether you believe the devil is real or not.

But it is one of Haiti's founding myths.

According to Haitian national history, the revolutionary war was launched on the eve of a religious ceremony at a place in the north called Bwa Kayiman (Bois Caiman, in French). At that ceremony on August 14, 1791, an African slave named Boukman sacrificed a pig, and both Kongo and Creole spirits descended to possess the bodies of the participants, encouraging them and fortifying them for the upcoming revolutionary war. Despite deep ambivalence on the part of intellectuals, Catholics, and the moneyed classes, Vodou has always been linked with militarism and the war of independence and, through it, the pride of national sovereignty.

So, yeah if there is a devil, Haiti made a pact with it. Might explain why even though Haiti and the Dominican Republic share the same island, the Dominican Republic has been far more successful.

2:50 PM  

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