MADOFF TAPPED TO WRITE BUSH LEGACY
By R J Shulman
WASHINGTON – (PTSD News) – President George W. Bush has asked investor Bernard Madoff to help write his biography. “My daddy always said, ‘Junior you must always put your best foot in your mouth forward,’” said Bush, “and what better guy to have on my side to convincicate the American people that I was pretty good at being a great president than the guy who convinicated all those people that his investments were good bet to place your money and not part of a big fat Fonzi scheme, so that’s why I decided to ask Bernie to write my autobiography.”

“This is really a win-win situation,” said Wilton Margolis,” a Bush spokesperson, “Bush needs an extreme make-over and Madoff will soon have a lot of time on his hands.” These two are like peas in a pod,” said Michael Stephenson, a history professor at Yale, “Bush began with a record surplus, Madoff had record investments and they both leave with huge deficits and debts.” “There is no better person than Bernie to shine up a pile of poop,” said Henry Brill, an out of work Wall Street investment manager, “he will make Bush look like an FDR or Lincoln and you can bet your bottom dollar on Bernie. I certainly did.”

The parties have not disclosed how much money Madoff will receive for his efforts, but President Bush said it didn’t matter as the payment was coming from the bailout money already approved by Congress.