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Post-Times-Sun-Dispatch

The Post-Times-Sun-Dispatch or PTSD is a newsource of serious political satire. Don't let a day go by without PTSD.

Saturday, December 06, 2008

FORGET WHAT BUSH WILL DO NEXT, IT’S CHENEY WE SHOULD BE WORRIED ABOUT
By R J Shulman
CHAPEL HILL, North Carolina – In a new book, Farleigh Williamson III, professor of political science at the University of North Carolina, says that normally the public is interested in what a president will do after their term, but this time it’s the vice president who should have their interest. “We have a reversal here,” says Williamson in his book The Puppetmaster Diaries, “not one gave a rats behind about what Dan Quayle did when he was out of office, but America should pay careful attention to Dick Cheney’s future plans.”

“The media will attempt to distract Americans from Cheney’s chicanery by trying to interest them with what Bush will do next. But no one is going to fall for that. For example, who wants to know about the George W. Bush library full of books he can’t read and memos he didn’t read, like the ones warning him about attacks by terrorists and hurricanes,” said Williamson.

“Without access to Guantanamo,” the book states, “Cheney will have to rely on a fresh supply of detainees. If Cheney is not shooting someone’s face off, he has to watch someone being tortured. Sometimes he needs both. It’s his obsession.” The book describes the secret prisons built in Arizona and Texas by Halliburton and how Cheney will abduct Americans who came up on his list of enemy combatants he obtained from the spying done by the telecommunications companies. The book also notes that Cheney has already chosen organ donors for himself when his heart, liver and other organs finally fail. “Now those people are in for a surprise,” the author says.

Williamson, who is now located in a safe house at an undisclosed location, is the author of the best selling Cheney biography, Drill, Baby, Drill; Kill, Baby Kill.

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