VP DEBATE BAILS OUT BAILOUT BILL
By R J Shulman
ST. LOUIS – (PTSD News) - The long awaited vice presidential debate between Sarah Palin and Joe Biden may be just what the doctor ordered to get the stalled $700 Billion Wall Street Bailout package through Congress. “While everyone is on the edge of their seat wondering what else Sarah Palin can see from her house, the House will be passing the bailout,” said Secretary of the Treasury Henry Paulsen.

“This sideshow of a debate is a great way to distract the American people from protest that the government is giving their tax dollars to Wall Street speculators,” said Ron Paul. “Just plunk a piece of pizza in front of the masses while they watch the zoo from St. Louis. It really is like bread and circuses.”

“The debate is the second step in overcoming the American public’s resistance to bailing out Wall Street,” said Fed Chairman Ben Bernanke. “The first was that we have successfully convinced the media to stop calling the bailout a bailout, but to call it a ‘rescue.’ That sounds better. We didn’t bail out New Orleans, we rescued New Orleans. Actually, come to think of it, we did neither.”

The ‘rescue’ bill will allow Wall Street investors and money managers to reap profits if the market goes up, but will subsidize any losses due to bad judgment, incompetence or just plain greed,” Paulsen said. “We are all socialists now,” said William J. Frappaine, a Wall Street broker, as he waved a banner with the Industrial Workers of the World symbol.