McCAIN COURTS LATINO VOTE: PERO MIS AMIGOS, DON’T TELL MY IMMIGRANT HATING REPUBLICAN BASE
By R J Shulman
ALBUQUERQUE, New Mexico – When it comes to Latino voters, Senator John McCain has become an equilibrista or tightrope walker. “I need the damn Hispanic votes,” McCain said, “but the Republican voter base hates Latinos, so if I say anything good about them, I’m screwed.” So far on the campaign trail, McCain has been telling Latino groups he still supports his original position of humane immigration reform, while assuring his Republican base voters that he despises the disease-ridden free loaders who don’t want to learn English.

“We have been concentrating on placing advertising on Spanish radio and TV stations which says Jonn supports their concerns,” said Rick Davis, McCain’s campaign manager, “I call it the no diga a Gringo approach, that is I, John McCain support you, but don’t tell whitey that I want to help you. At the same time, we will pound the traditional media with his new stand on how much he wants to have the illegals sent back to wherever they came from, after they vote for him, of course.”

“It pays to be bilingual and bi-positioned,” McCain said. “Sounds more like McCain is bipolar,” said Howard Dean Chairman of the Democratic National Committee.