BUSH TO BRING BACK ANOTHER TRADTIONAL AMERICAN VALUE: THE COLD WAR
by R J Shulman
WASHINGTON, D.C., - President George W. Bush heads to the G-8 summit of industrialized nations in Germany with one goal in mind. “In order to achievacate the greatness that was the American people in the1950’s,” the President said yesterday, “we need to bring back the two most important things that mattered back then, the wholesome family valueness of the Leave it to Beavers and the terror of the Cold War.”

“The President will jump start the cold war,” said Presidential Press Secretary Tony Snow, “with his plan to build a missile defense system as close to Russia as possible. And it seems to be working as President Vladimir Putin has become as mad as Kruschev did when he pounded his shoe at the UN.”

“Georogie is well aware that popularity rises if you are a war President,” said Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice, “but since the public is getting tired of the “hot” war in Iraq, it is time to resurrect the cold war that was so successful in building the arms industry after World War II.”

“Would you rather,” said Vice President Dick Cheney, a strong supporter of any war, “have the Iron Curtain re-built over there or over here?”