CONGRESS VOTES ITSELF RAISE TELLING COMPLAING AMERICANS THEY SHOULD DO THE SAME
By R J Shulman
WASHINGTON – (PTSD News) – Congress voted themselves pay raises that will cost the American taxpayer $2.5 million. When confronted by comments from angry Americans, who are suffering from the worst economic downturn since the great depression, House Speaker Nancy Pelosi said, “I don’t understand the ruckus. Who wouldn’t vote themselves a raise?”

If they didn’t get their raise, they wouldn’t be able to continue to serve the American people,” said Lesley Stringer, a Congressional spokesperson, “and if they weren’t there in Congress, who would be left to tell the auto workers to take a pay cut?”

But not everyone agrees with the congressional pay increase. "Members of Congress don't deserve one additional dime of taxpayer money in 2009," said Tom Schatz, president of the Council for Citizens Against Government Waste. “They have crapped on us again, or my name isn’t Schatz.”

“I certainly dererve a raise,” said Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid, “it takes a lot of work to defend yourself againt the verbal attacks of all of those people who are jealous of my health care benefits, just because they failed to get themselves into a good plan.”

“This is just another battle of the class war, where those that have earned weath and benefits are being attacked by those that want to spread the wealth around, like that communist Obama,” said Rush Limbaugh. “If these people are so bent out of shape that congress gets a raise, why don’t they get off their drug-addled lazy behinds and run for congress?”